Once in a Blue Moon
by tushmonkey
Summary: For the first time...I don't think I can do as you say. I knew before that it wasn't going to be easy with the way everything in the world is now. But you never said it would get this difficult either.
1. Your Patience Fades

**Some friendly advice: Read one font at a time. The italics are the past while the normal font is the present. If you go back from one to the other, it starts to get a bit confusing.**

**Also, the 'you' the narrator is talking about IS NOT Casshern.**

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**~Once in a Blue Moon~**

I'm not sure I can do this anymore.

_Noises erupted from downstairs in the middle of the night._

I know I promised, but it's more painful than I imagined it to be.

_I didn't move from my room because that's what you had said to do in times like these._

Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't so lonely all the time.

_And the last thing I wanted was to upset you._

Yes, I think that's the worst part of it all.

_I watched you pace back and forth the next morning. I felt the tugging need to ask you…_

What day is it now?

"_Did something happen last night?"_

It's been so long. All the days are just jumbled together; I stopped counting somewhere after twenty.

_You didn't answer right away._

I can only recognize morning from night now.

_You said, "I need to leave."_

Where did you go?

"_Should I accompany-"_

Where are you now?

"_No!" you yelled._

Are you alright?

_I didn't say anything after that. It was the first time you'd ever raised your voice._

I've done exactly as you said.

_You apologized for it soon after, but there was no need._

I've been sitting here the whole time, hoping to spot you as soon as you come back.

_I always forgave you._

Though I can't help but miss you.

_You said it was dangerous out there._

Perhaps I should go find you.

_You told me to wait and caressed my cheek._

But that wouldn't be okay, would it? You would say no.

_You swore you'd be back and left with just your coat._

Even so, I will. You mean too much to me…

_All I could do was watch from the window._

I throw on a sweater and put on that necklace you gave me.

_Nothing I could've said would have made you stay._

Grab a marker from the drawer.

_And if you needed to go, who was I to stop you?_

Say farewell to Mr. Chair and Mrs. Window.

_But I'm alone now._

Scribble some words on a sheet.

_And it's no fun because…_

And close the door behind me, beginning my journey to find you.

_Living without you is much too hard me._

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**Author's Note: This is a big change for me. I thought since Maria is about halfway over, I should try something new. And this is it. I noticed some time ago that there's a big shortage on Casshern stories, so I wanted to try writing one. It'll be difficult, but I'll try.**

**I'll see you all next time!**


	2. Running Is the Only Choice

**Author's Note: I DEEPLY APOLOGIZE FOR THE TIMING OF THIS. It was never my intention to update so late. But school has started and I barely have time to get on the computer anymore. Good news is *drum roll* I planned ahead because I knew something like this would happen and I wrote a decent amount of chapters beforehand. Anyway, let's get it started!**

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**~Once in a Blue Moon~**

"_I can't come with you?" I questioned. "Do you not want me around anymore?"_

They're so cruel to me. I've done nothing to them and yet they won't stop.

They won't listen to my pleas for help. That was all I wanted, really.

"Please wait!" I shout. "I don't mean any harm."

But it seems I'm getting the exact opposite.

I've only gotten about half a mile from the house and this is where I end up.

Backed against a rock, surrounded by my own rust ridden kind.

What has happened in the time I've been away? Why didn't you mention this?

Is everyone this way? Please let it not be so.

"Where is he?" they shout at once.

Do they mean you? "Who?"

"Don't toy with us!" one hollers, his face inches from mine. "Where is he?"

"I don't know," I cry. "I honestly don't know." Or another?

Somebody advises the group of me being a waste of time, but it goes unheard.

"I bet she's lying!"

"She's gotta know where Casshern is."

"Yeah! Just look at her. She's practically brand new!"

I know of no Casshern. He is not you.

Something pierces the nighttime air and they turn. I wonder what it is…

A chilling scream? An agonizing howl?

Nonetheless, it doesn't matter. My chance has now come.

I trot as quietly as possible from my spot and, when I'm far enough, sprint away.

All that time spent in the house has slowed me down and I tire easily.

They're a ways away, but their footsteps sound as if right next to me.

The rain clouds rush in and change the sand into a slush of mud.

The thunder silences the footsteps and I can't tell if they're still following, but I keep on.

Even in such a clumsy state, I go on. Anyone would rather be safe than sorry.

Around the fourth time I trip is when it appears-

A fortune the rain has blessed me with; a crevice wide enough to take me in.

Sliding against its cool walls, I can only think of you and all the things you do.

Your glimmering eyes. Chills ran down my spine with every glance you offered.

That one chipped tooth that showed when you smile, it still makes me laugh.

Ah! And what a smile you have. It could radiate the Earth if you let it.

But your voice is the most wondrous above all else.

How it could sway and sooth me whenever you saw fit.

How, even when you weren't around, my mind replayed it over and over,

Letting me fall deeper and deeper into the trance of being yours.

But I have little to go on now. When was the last time we spoke? Oh please tell me.

Never mind. I've thought of something to say instead.

If there's any chance at all that you're listening, I need you to know…

I finally understand what you meant when called me silly and said,

"_I just know that once you leave, you'll never come back to me."_

I just hope you realize that the roles are switched. You should have never been worried.

I didn't leave.

It is now me who fears you'll never come back, don't you see?

And, in my eyes, that'd be much more devastating than finally finding you,

Only to lay limp and lifeless in your arms.

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**I hope this was satisfying enough for the wait. I'll try my hardest to update sooner, but please do understand. Any opinions, questions, etc. you'd like to share, please don't hesitate! I love reviews and anything you have to comment on.**

**P.S. I will most likely make all my chapters in this form since they're all pretty short and straight-forward. Although, it seems Fanfiction does not quite agree with the form I previously wanted so this is all I can give. Please forgive me if you're displeased.**

**Until next time, lovelies:)**


	3. A Kind Soul Bears a Gift

**~Once in a Blue Moon~**

_You came earlier than what I'd gotten used to._

_The creaks from the floorboards spooked me until you opened my door._

_I couldn't control the smile that crossed my lips; it was as if you brought it along._

_But it felt so good, and it felt even better to see you._

_As you made your way toward my bed, you did that familiar neck scratching gesture._

_Were you as happy as me? I couldn't tell._

"_Good morning…_

Dawn's golden rays shine in my eyes. Is it really that time already?

_It's morning. It's morning, _they sing. _No time for snoring._

It burns slightly to lift myself from the ground and out into the open.

I guess the running I did last night exhausted me much more than expected.

Looking in various directions, I see I'm alone. Did they give up on me?

Perhaps they did, but I don't wait to find out. I start walking again.

They intended on hurting me and I won't give them that satisfaction.

Not until I find you.

I just need to make sure you're alright.

I don't mind what will take place afterward…

The scent of salt floats into my nostrils. Whatever it is, it's familiar.

I remember you smelling like this sometimes. Where did you say you went again?

Oh, curse this poor memory of mine! It's times like these when I need you the most.

To help me remember, I mean. You were such a great -

Ocean? Is that what this smell is?

Why didn't you mention how blue it is? How wonderful it looks…

Or maybe you did and I just can't remember.

It does seem somewhat recognizable. Was it in one of those books you carried?

You know, the ones with all the pictures.

The position keeps changing: back and forth, back and forth.

That's a wave, right?

"It's so cold," I state, sticking my feet in. So cold, yet so inviting…

My reflection glistens against the water under me.

Covered head to toe in dirt. How pitiful. The only thing that I can make out are my eyes.

Their hazel color is only a slight contrast from the grime, though.

I strip and soak my clothes to wring out the excess particles. When I'm finished,

I place them on a nearby rock and travel farther into the watery depths.

It'll take time to get myself clean, but I'm not in much of a rush.

I doubt there's anyone walking around at this hour; the sun hasn't fully risen yet.

The mess finally begins to come undone and my skin regains it's paleness.

Rubbing my scalp produces filth almost identical to the black of my hair.

"Much better," I sigh. I couldn't have you seeing me like that.

You'd be repulsed.

A sound from the shore catches me by surprise. My instinct tells me to hide.

But it's my curiosity that takes over. So with caution, I turn.

'She's so small' is the first thing that comes to mind. With round purple eyes,

and fluffy blond hair. I can only wonder who this child is.

"Hey there," she says, excitement lacing her features.

Even with her size, I can feel my body cowering away. "Hello."

I've only said one word to her. How can she smile so easily?

"Isn't the ocean nice?"

Is it rude to stare? If so, I can't help it. "Possibly."

She giggles and runs onto a cliff not too far up from where I stand.

Although I can't know anything other than her looks and giggles,

I worry immensely that, as she dangles her legs over the edge, she'll fall in.

"Please be careful," I advise. "You don't want to get hurt."

She giggles again, this time with closed eyes. "I've been up here plenty of times."

"Have you?" She nods. "This must be very pleasant to see all the time."

"It is, but the shells are the best part!"

"Shells?"

She reaches into her dress pocket and drops something into my hands.

It reminds me of a fan - a pink and white fan.

Running my fingers across it, a hint of a smile plays on my lips. "It's very pretty."

"You can keep it if you want!"

"Won't you need it for something?"

She declines with a shake of her head. "I've got plenty more back with Ohji."

"How nice," I whisper more to myself than to her.

"Do you want to meet him?" She shouts for him before I can answer.

"No," I speak. "Please don't." The thought of last night is still fresh in my mind.

When she sees me backing away again, she frowns. I should have known better...

"Are you leaving already?" she asks.

The dread I feel causes my throat to swell and I no longer wish to speak with her.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you sad."

Apologies will fix nothing. It's much too late for those remorseful phrases.

"If you _are _leaving," she tries again, "could you at least tell me your name?"

My name? Oh yes, my name. What was it you always called me?

Cecilia? Selene? No, neither of those are right.

Oh. Now I remember. You called me…

…_Celeste."_

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**Hello again everyone:) Glad to be back for the third chappie! I hope it was to your liking. Gah, I really do. I'll probably be putting another chapter up within a week or two becuase it's pretty short and I really hate keeping you all waiting.**

**Any questions, comments, or concerns? You know where to go;) ...And if you don't, I'm talking about the review box! They really are a big help, guys. In order to keep the story going, I'd like to know how you all feel about it so far.**

**Anywho, with all that said, I wish you all a wonderful day:)**


	4. Everything Flutters Away

**~Once in a Blue Moon~**

_They floated across my vision so gracefully._

_What were they? Perhaps winged messengers?_

_I hadn't seen them before today, after you left._

_Did you send them to me? _

_So that, in some way, I'd have you by my side?_

Please make them stop.

I've already asked them so nicely to, yet they won't.

You should order them to. They'll obey you, I know they will.

That way, they'll cease from dripping onto my favorite dress,

And you won't have to see me this way. We'd both win.

Wouldn't you want that? I would think so.

You liked it most when I was smiling.

Sadly, I can't do that if they're leaving trails on my cheeks. I've already tried.

I do have more positive news to tell you, though.

Those little things are back. I can't quite remember what you called them…

Butterflies, was it? With the pretty patterns and all?

I saw one this morning. I was hoping there'd be more, but it was only that one.

I wonder if it lost its way like me; it seemed somewhat lonely.

Of course I offered my company, but it moved along.

Admirable, wouldn't you say?

I wonder if it's searching for someone like me, as well.

A butterfly like you…

_As I watched them sparkle against the empty sky,_

_I couldn't help feeling a bit envious of their unrestrained abilities._

_On that night, I so dearly wished I could fly._

_Fly straight into your arms…_

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**Any questions, comments, or concerns? Why not drop a review by!**

**So I watched episode 19 (I think it was) this past Saturday on Adult Swim and I was really surprised to see the same idea I had when I was only around episode 10 was used! Just so everyone knows, I made this chapter before I even saw episode 19 and I didn't steal any ideas! I don't want anyone thinking I did anything like that or getting upset with me cause I want you all to be my happy little readers :) And I guess butterflies is a common thing to have symbolisms for so...**

**Anywho, til the next chapter :)**


	5. That Wolf Who Howls in the Twilight

**~Once in a Blue Moon~**

I'm about to make my way into a forest holding black-barked trees and stubbly grass

When I hear those familiar footsteps stop somewhere up the hill behind me.

"I see her!" I hear one yell.

To think I was starting to believe this would only happen once.

How foolish of me…

I'm not quite sure, but there might be more of them compared to last time.

Which, if true or false, remains a hazard to my safety.

Nevertheless, I jog into the forest just minutes before they reach me.

Some hopeful part of me wants them to halt their charging when they witness me go in,

However there's no time for wishful thoughts that carry no aid in my escape.

I try to maneuver through the maze of plants without leaving too much of a trail.

And it seems to work.

For a while, that is.

I wish someone had told me beforehand that the only trails I'm capable of leaving

Are circles.

They're onto to me as quickly as they lost me and I take a sharp turn.

I take a peek over my shoulder and, strangely enough, see them in the same spots.

"Why aren't they - Ah!"

Tripping over a root results in taking a roll down a steep, pointy hill,

Only to land sopping wet in water with a suspicious musk.

I'd be lying to say this is a gratifying experience for me, but hearing them say,

"Do you think she's alive?"

"She can't be. No one could survive that fall."

"Let's just get out of here."

Is enough to withstand this strange scent a bit longer than necessary.

Night's coming along soon, anyhow. Staying here is probably for the best.

I usually enjoy the brisk breezes the night has to offer,

But I lost my sweater on the fall down here and this water's awfully cold.

Fortunately, I can see it hanging from a branch above.

The only problem now is how I'll manage to reach it.

Hopping and stretching doesn't seem to work, so what should I do?

A splash from across the pond ripples towards me, compelling me to look that way.

It's hard to see anything in this fading light and I don't spot it right away.

Yet it stares at me from the shadows; those luminescent eyes watch my every move.

The need for my sweater is suddenly pushed to the back of the line.

Maybe this creature will leave me be if I do the same. We stay to our respective seats,

Battling each other with our eyes. Though the game's cut short when it moves closer.

I've never seen anything like it. Or perhaps I have…

_With ears raised high, gray eyes bore into my soul. _

_Its fur is a combination of black, brown, and white. "Wolves," I read from the page._

"_Often found in packs, they use bloodcurdling howls for communication._

"…_Howls are mostly used to alert pack-members of a nearby threat or prey._

_I skim to the end. "…Though a lone wolf might simply howl for the fact that it is __alone__."_

"So tell me, are you a lone wolf?"

It's out of hiding now, about two or three feet away from me.

"Or do you have a pack?"

A hasty feeling of interest urges me to move closer also.

Contrary to my willingness to its movements, it growls at my oncoming form.

Sighing, I sit again while it maneuvers to my left.

"Perhaps you're just a grumpy wolf," I grin lightly.

It takes a sharp glance upward. What does it see?

Then, in an abrupt surge of energy, leaps halfway up the hill and runs back down.

It circles to greet me and drops something at my feet.

"My sweater," I say. "How sweet of you to get it for me."

I'm hesitant to put out my hand to pet it, but it leans in on its own obligation.

"Would you mind telling me where you come from?"

No answer. It just lays against my knee.

"That's probably not important. I'm just glad to have you around."

It gives something equivalent to a grunt.

"I must ask you another question, if you don't mind," I state, staring at the moon.

The crooked trees only add to its beauty as it shines above.

"If you aren't a lone wolf, nor a wolf of many, who exactly are you with?"

It must have a friend. Is that what I'm for?

Although it probably doesn't need one. Otherwise it'd turn out much like me…

Weak and defenseless.

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**End of Chapter 5! Celeste meets Friender! But of course Celeste, being Celeste, thinks he's a wolf. Which, I don't know about you guys, is really cute to me :) But you guys know what that means, right? A certain brood of a man is coming up in the next chapter! I'M SO EXCITED.**

**And since I updated two chapters today (cause that's just how I roll), I might wait a bit while longer to put some more out. Not just because I want to make you guys wait for Casshern's debut, which I definately do, but because I don't want to rush the story. I also need to write more chapters :$ But we're packing for our big move so we'll just see how that goes.**

**Questions, comments, or concerns? Reviews are were to put 'em!**

**Anyhow, thanks for taking your time to read these. I really do love you guys**

**Tata For Now :)**


	6. Brings A Familiar Stranger

**~Once in a Blue Moon~**

The forest is quite silent at the moment; it's much more preferred this way, really.

The trees have an awfully close resemblance to dancing shadows;

I find myself applauding for encores every now and then.

It alarms my weary ears to hear the steady _plopping _of footsteps.

Morning has barely begun and, in the silvery rays of daybreak,

I can see him wandering off in the distance.

"Where are you going?" I question. "I thought we were becoming friends."

I was _hoping_, in the very least.

He stops to listen, staring from over his shoulder. Is he thinking it over?

Why doesn't he move? He's so still…

When I get up, he returns to walking.

"I see," I speak through a smile. "You want me to follow."

I wonder where he'll lead me. To his pack, perhaps?

That'd be nice. I would enjoy meeting the rest of his makeshift family.

I just hope they're all as amiable as him.

But something's wrong.

Not with the wolf or the forest,

Something's the matter with me.

It's getting difficult to keep my balance.

My stable inhales of oxygen become shallow, feathery quivers.

Falling to my knees, my arms wrap around my torso.

"What's happening to me?"

Slowly, he approaches and nudges my forearm with his nose.

"Don't worry. I'm sure I'll manage."

I'm not sure at all, actually. Yet there's nothing I can do about it now.

I pick myself up and keep walking, unsteady footprints trailing behind us.

A thought ponders my mind as we go.

The odor's gone. I smelled it all night, yet there's nothing now.

Is that what's making me feel this way? I knew it was strange…

It's nearly nightfall again when we reach a hollow cave.

I collapse on the floor under the one stream of light I can find.

Although it does little to reheat my shivering body, I'm thankful for its efforts.

Which reminds me…

"Mr. Wolf?" I call with a cough. "Where did you run off to this time?"

His blue form comes into view and seats himself so we're face-to-face.

"Now where is this pack you wanted me to meet so badly?"

No movement occurs, but I'd be apprehensive toward a stranger, too.

"It's alright," I murmur. "I promise not to bite."

Sounds manifest across the cave and I feel a twinge of anxiety. I hope they like me…

Sitting upright, I watch a silhouette peek from the raven scenery.

It doesn't look anything like the other wolf. It actually looks like -

A gasp escapes my throat and I raise myself against the wall. Can it really be?

Instead of waiting for you to come to me, I shuffle your way.

As we meet, the moon raises outside and brightens the cave.

The smile that's come to grace my face is substituted for a frown upon realization that,

Between a jaded mind and eyes,

Those hands I longed to hold,

Those hips I wanted to hug,

And those lips I wished to kiss

Are, in fact, not yours at all.

Whoever this man happens to be, he is certainly not you.

Taking a few steps back, I let out a few whimpers. No, not now…

It's much too late to plead, so all I can do is let them run free.

He might not be you, but I can't tear my eyes away from him.

The white body suit covers him whole, showing off his slim physique.

Chocolate tresses frame his sapphire gaze,

And I can't help noticing its disheartened qualities.

That must be my fault. Is there any possible way for him to feel better?

"If you think I'm crying because of you," I start, "that isn't the case at all."

He's backed against the wall, hands in his hair and head on his knees.

Wobbling my way to him with the help of Mr. Wolf, I rest a safe distance away.

He doesn't speak, but he takes time to spare me a few glances.

And I glance too, wondering what sort of creature could be

So stainless, so unblemished

In a land where all have failed to elude

the brutal uncertainties that life brings.

It's surprising that after so long, he chooses now to break his well-kept silence.

"Why?"

"Why, what?" I reply.

"You were crying, why?"

Something told me he was going to ask. I was just too busy hoping he wouldn't.

I sigh, fumble my fingers across my sleeves, and say,

"You just… reminded me of someone."

He's quick to open his mouth again, but I'm quicker.

"If you don't mind," I begin, "I'd like to know you're name."

I bet he has no name,

Angels never do.

His hesitation seems endless until he whispers, "Casshern."

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**That's the end of this chappie! Sorry for such a long wait guys. Meant to put this up weeks ago, but never got a chance. But ermagawd I'm so in love with the idea of CasshernxCeleste because of reasons that you are not allowed to know but I would love to tell you if it wasn't a spoiler. And Lyuze is in the story too. I wouldn't leave her out just because of Celeste.**

**In fact, I'm totally down for CasshernxLyuze but this is not that and, goshdarnit, it will never be that unless I make it a CelestexCasshernxLyuze type thing which is not out of the question and I'm sorry for being so annoying but I've had five cups of coffee and am not very stable at the moment so I apologize again.**

** XXX-Broken-Wings-XXX: In response to what kind of being Celeste is, I'm afraid I cannot say. I'm thinking of writing a sort of explanation of unsaid/unexplained things at the end of the story, seeing that the fanfic is written in a slightly poetic way where you can't always say things as they are. So, basically, you'll have to wait and see.**

**Happy Thanksgiving (if you celebrate it) everyone!**

**Til' next time:)**


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